How are you today, Yayoi?
I'm very good, Kanako.
I see. I'm happy to hear that.
I read another fascinating book.
My, what was this fascinating book called?
Well... Oh, I've forgotten the title.
Will you tell me what kind of story it was?
Yes, gladly.
It was the tale of a boy born of the hands of man.
Created by a genius scientist, the mechanical child
has the power to hold two hundred tons,
while flying through the sky, or to carry a robot into space.
But the boy's innocent, youthful antics finally irritate his scientist father...
My, what a futuristic story!
This cute young automaton had a phrase he would always say.
What was it? Tell me.
NJAAAA-
You really are a girl, aren't you, Jun?
Of course. I always have been.
Are you going to keep hiding it?
It's too late to tell everyone.
I'd be too embarrassed to come here anymore.
That's not true. Nobody would make fun of you.
Yo.
What's spooking you, Kamigamo? You sound like a girl.
Don't open the door!
I'm still changing.
Kaya-san's in there with you.
You're such a girly man.
Or are you that embarrassed for me to see your weak, tiny body?
I think somebody might.
Anyway, Kaya-san, please keep this a secret.
All right.
What are you doing, Hajime-chan?
Master Do What You Like
Hey.
Go pick up some things for me.
Super sale on watermelons! 500 yen each!
There's a big sale on watermelons at the shopping district.
I'm going to use them for a special menu, so bring all you can.
Sure. Let's go, Kamigamo.
Me, too?
We men have to be the ones to do it.
You wanna make Arashi-san and Kaya-san do heavy lifting?
Yasaka, wait. Let me rest a bit.
What? We've barely walked at all.
But these are heavy.
Oh, all right.
Give me one.
Thanks.
It's pretty heavy five at a time.
We're taking a shortcut.
A shortcut?
I'm amazed you know about this place.
Arashi-san and I go all over this area,
now and in the past.
I see.
I didn't know there was a shrine here.
This place wasn't bombed, so it hasn't changed a bit.
It's too hot... I'm dying.
I can't go on. I can't go on...
And I'm parched.
We're saved!
My wallet's with my clothes.
Same here.
All I have left is this change.
Milk
What's wrong, Master?
This milk's expired.
June 1... That was two months ago.
It doesn't even feel like liquid anymore.
We should throw it out.
We haven't even opened it.
What a waste.
But you can't possibly drink it now.
Any customers here with strong stomachs?
They'll shut you down.
I know! You guys can go to the past, right?
Yeah.
I guess so.
Then take this back to May, would you?
If it expires June 1, the "me" existing in May should be able to drink it.
It's already spoiled. I don't think it'll help to take it into the past.
But it'll be before the expiration date.
Oh, I get it. So it'll be fine.
No, it won't!
Why?
It won't have expired.
That's just what the label says.
So you're saying the label is wrong, then?
No. What makes it wrong is that you're taking it to the past...
What's wrong with drinking milk, which expires on June 1, in the middle of May?
That's true.
It is not!
Then what's wrong?
You can't drink this now, right?
Of course not. It expired.
And you're taking it two months into the past, right?
Yes, so it won't have expired yet.
How do I explain this?!
You drink first.
Man, that's good stuff.
What's wrong?
Nothing. It's nothing.
I'm fine.
What, you done already?
Yeah.
OK.
You do want more.
Drink.
I'm fine. I don't want it.
Come on, take it.
I said, I don't want it.
Watch out!
Ow...
Be careful, Kamigamo.
It's your fault for forcing it on me after I said I didn't need it.
Why do you have my face?
I ask the same of you: Why do you have my face?
I've always had this face.
That's my face! Idiot!
You're a fake me!
You're pretending to be human and plotting to take over the Earth, aren't you?
Where'd that come from?
Wh-What the hell?
What happened?
You're me, and I'm you.
I'm you, and you're me?
You switched?
That's right, Arashi-san!
Kamigamo is in my body, and I, Yasaka Hajime, am in his.
Oh, I get it!
I may not look it, but I'm pretty strict about money.
Get your ass to work.
What's that?
The master took over my body.
Just like her, huh?
That's how you think I am?
I'm not imitating anybody.
We really switched, Arashi-san!
OK, OK. I understand.
Kaya-san!
Yes.
I may not look it, but I'm pretty strict about money.
Get your ass to work.
I'm going to murder you all.
No, really...
Why won't you believe us?
I don't care if you have fun, but if it affects your work, it comes out of your pay.
Anyway, the receipt and change.
Arashi-san's read on her was right.
What's wrong? You won't eat?
I'm not hungry.
Eat!
I want my body to stay healthy.
Anyhow, this body's so weak.
I can't carry anything heavy, I get tired after running just a little bit,
and I get full after barely eating anything.
I'm not a glutton like you.
I got it. The problem is that this body has a tiny stomach.
I just have to enlarge it, so I can eat more, and then I'll get some stamina.
Hand that to me.
Stop it!
If you eat that much, you'll get fat!
But you really should gain weight.
No! Don't eat any more!
Oh, come on!
It's for your own good.
Nobody's asking you! Stop eating and give that to me!
What are you doing?
Arashi-san?
Don't take Jun-kun's food, Hajime-chan.
Th-That's not it. He's trying to make me gain weight...
You ate your own already.
You really are such a boy.
Give it back to Jun-kun.
Salt, please.
Fine.
Good. Be friends.
What are you doing, Kamigamo?
Arashi-san thinks less of me now!
It's because you're screwing around.
Oh, honestly.
Where are you going?
Gotta pee.
What?
Hey, Yasaka.
You and I are best friends, right?
What's this, all of a sudden?
You and I are best friends, right?
Y-Yeah.
Then as your best friend, I have a request.
What is it?
Don't go to the bathroom.
This is something only you can do for me, and it's really important.
Understand?
Come on. It's impossible.
I have to go, or I'll pee my pants!
Hold it in.
No way!
Move!
Coward.
You're a man, right?
Being a man doesn't mean you can hold it forever.
Are you breaking your promise?
I haven't promised anything yet!
As a man, aren't you embarrassed to betray your best friend?
No best friend would ever keep me from the toilet!
Wait, Yasaka!
They're gone. They're gone! They're gone!
Dude, your body's messed up!
Your balls are gone!
Oh man, maybe you dropped them somewhere when we switched bodies?
Don't cry, Kamigamo.
We'll find them.
That's weird. Maybe you dropped them around the shrine?
Hey, Kamigamo?
Is my body OK?
It's not missing them, too...
I think you're OK.
Show me.
I want to see if my balls are safe.
No!
Why?
I don't want to see them,
and I don't want anyone else to!
Come on. They're mine anyway!
That's not the issue!
Yes, it is!
Anyhow, they should be safe, so don't worry.
Relax!
What if they changed shape or something?
I have to see to make sure!
They're fine.
I guarantee it.
No way. Show me!
No. No. Stop.
Please!
No!
Pass the salt.
Um, I dunno how to say this...
Do it quietly, somewhere.
Have fun.
She totally misunderstood that!
What do you mean, she misunderstood that?
You don't have to understand.
Oh, no. I hadn't gone to the bathroom yet.
Damn it!
Hey, you.
Yes?
Can I get some salt?
Sure.
You're crazy.
I almost wet myself.
There was no other way.
Are you going to punch me every time I go to the bathroom?
So, what do we do now?
There are three possibilities.
One! We wait for ourselves to turn back.
Two! I live as Kamigamo Jun, and you live as Yasaka Hajime.
Three! Just like until now, I live as me, and you live as you.
How?
Like a man. I'll convince everyone I'm Yasaka Hajime, and you convince everyone you're Kamigamo Jun.
No one will believe that.
Just say your voice changed.
Your voice changing doesn't mean your face changes, too!
You don't know that for sure.
Sure, I do!
Then what's your idea?
It's pointless... I'm out of ideas.
You're fine. You just got a different body.
I'm missing my important manly parts!
Damn, it's like I'm a woman!
Maybe it's my imagination, but I think my breasts are bigger, too.
Feels awful.
Stop it!
Don't touch them!
I'm just kidding... Just kidding...
They're not any bigger at all.
Totally flat. Totally flat. Totally flat...
Mt. Fuji
Anyhow, let's think hypothetically.
Hypothetically?
Hypothetically, if we do switch back someday,
if we each go off alone, it will be really hard to convince people when we revert.
That's true.
Please, don't do anything weird while in my body.
At the same time, hypothetically, if we never turn back,
and if we start acting according to personality,
we'll seem different to others, which won't be good.
But we are different.
The point is this: we pretend to be who we appear.
I'll pretend to be Kamigamo Jun, and you pretend to be Yasaka Hajime.
For how long?
Till we turn back.
If we don't turn back, forever.
No way. I don't wanna...
Kamigamo...
I can't believe I have to spend the rest of my life as Yasaka Hajime...
This sucks.
It just sucks!
Why does this have to happen to me?
That kind of pisses me off.
Anyway, we may switch back real soon.
There's no point in bitching about things we don't understand.
Yasaka...
Keep your spirits up!
You sure are optimistic.
Yeah, a man's always gotta be optimistic.
Even though I'm missing my balls!
How about some cold water?
Wow, you're really serious today.
I'm always serious, Arashi-san.
Rice curry at table 3.
Roger. I'm totally Kamigamo, dood.
2 Kusuka chips at table 5.
Right, Arashi-san.
I'm totally Kamigamo, dood.
Hey, can I get some salt?
We're low on beans. Jun, grind some more, would you?
Right! 'Cause I'm Kamigamo, dood.
What are you doing? I'm Kamigamo, dood!
What's with the "dood" crap?
We're pretending to be each other, right?
I don't talk like that!
I'm trying my best!
Stop trying to do all the little things, and just act normally.
Jun.
Yes?
Jeez, I think you're in a glass house here.
Nobody's perfect!
Don't talk to me. Go make that order.
Sorry. I'm Kamigamo, dood.
Stop doing that!
What am I gonna do if everyone thinks I'm a weirdo...
What's wrong?
Nothing. It's nothing.
Kaya-san knows I'm a girl.
If she talks to Yasaka while thinking he's me...
Kitchen
What did you want to talk about, Hajime?
Um, Kaya-san, about that secret of Kamigamo's you're keeping...
Do you know his secret?
No, not a thing!
I know nothing!
I see...
Actually, I'd like you not to talk to Kamigamo about that secret of his that I don't know about.
I mean, he knows. But I don't think he wants to hear it again.
You should keep it a secret from him.
What are you talking about?
Um, you see... I have no idea what I'm talking about anymore.
What's wrong, Yasaka?
I'm Kamigamo, dood.
It's no good. He's going to find out.
Hajime-chan! Jun-kun!
Go back in time?
Master says it's really been bugging her.
Go back in time two months and drink this.
She says she wants to see who's right.
Oh, no. I didn't think of this.
What's wrong?
Who knows what'll happen if we go through time now.
Some unknown power could keep us from ever coming back.
There's even the possibility that we'll form a paradox, and the universe will explode.
And even if we survive drinking it, we'll be locked in the bathroom.
No way. What should we do?
It can't be helped.
Not at all.
At times like this,
we run!
Wait!
Why, you...
Don't scream like a girl.
I'm the one who's missing his balls.
Stupid kids!
Wait!
We'll lose her on the back roads.
Hold on tight!
You drink first.
OK.
Brings you back to life...
Here.
It's good.
You drank it all!
Why not?
I'm thirsty.
Same here!
Whatever...
I'll buy another.
If you've got money, then don't be stingy.
Hey, that's my wallet!
When did you...
Well, it's mine now.
It's my money!
Even if it's yours, your body's drinking it, so it's fine.
I won't feel like I drank it, though.
Fine, fine.
You should lighten up.
I'll give it back when we get home.
You think you're going home alive?
No! Run!
You won't get away!
You're me...
and I'm you...
I'm me...
and I'm me?
To Be Continued
I read another fascinating book.
Will you tell me what kind of story it was?
Yes, gladly.
It was the story of those who had mastered the culture and traditions of cooking.
Their history begins in 1899, in Tokyo's Nihonbashi market,
and continues as they move with the fish markets to land reclaimed
after the Great Kanto Earthquake in 1923, passing on their traditions to ensuing generations.
Their obsessive focus on ingredients and the legendary taste,
a closely guarded secret, becomes the fuel which powers the masked heir.
My, what an appetizing story!
This prince, who so loved the world of food, had a phrase he would always say.
What was it? Tell me.
No useless-
When you think of a summer...
Gotta be watermelons!
When you tap them, you can tell by their sound whether they're ripe!
Think this one's kinda empty.
That's my head!
Get up bright and early tomorrow!
Illustration by Nakamura Hikaru